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lunch with Leïla and Ada tomorrow at Bastille and youre coming too cause Ada wants to introduce us to a friend, its non-negotiable xx

Introduce us to a friend

yeah the homeless bartender she told you about

Oh the dumpster-lifting guy?

thats the one

Don't wait for me for dinner I've been asked to go and do something near gare du nord

not at all worrying of course

No it’s not what you think, I’m gonna meet a street artist who’s gonna explain something to me

oh ok i see

please be careful

btw i stole a calendar at work since you wanted one

i just realized weve been together for like two years isnt that crazy

you werent home tonight

call me ok

Astro? its been three days

you said you wouldnt do the disappearing act thing again


Sometimes I have a hard time dealing with things uh emotionally

I can't even promise it won't happen again

i dont even get why you do it

And I don't get why you put up with me

you know damn well why i put up with you you fucking asshole

and dont make me write it again please its cringe

You're wasting your time with me you deserve better

You're wasting your life with a fucking freak who can't give you anything

lmao what should I say then

You're not the one who's genetics says so

fuck klinefelter

fuck your chromosomes

genetics is just a big fat whore ok

Watch your mouth

oh yeah sorry Astro

sex workers are very respectable and contribute positively to society. let me try again

hm hm. genetics is a jailer

I'm starting to regret teaching you that word

I had to leave early but I left you a paper

Could you contact Theo and tell him about this job, it's also in a bar, but since it's not a uh uh normal job, I don't want you to give him the contacts by text, you never know

Just give him the paper ok?

ohhhhh secret mission! :D

That but unironically

secret mission secret mission secret mission

Cyril did you forget to take your meds

no wtf are you implying

Real talk I'd like to tell him about the store that K. told me about but it's too much sensitive information at once for a guy I don't trust completely yet

Théo is nice though

Everyone seems nice at first glance that doesn't mean anything

I mean look at your mother


[37 messages deleted]

I already asked you not to text about this stuff


You never know who might read it

yeah yeah sorry

i just had too much hype

Weren't you supposed to go to work?

promise you wont get mad

Uh that depends but yes

i quit


the boss wanted to lay me off because the other day i was in the storeroom crying after a difficult call where someone yelled at me and i yelled back

i quit first i don't even want to go talk to him

youre not replying

youre mad

I just don't get it

Well you'll find something else I guess

yes i promise

Please ask your shrink to fix your meds though

yes yes

thank you for not being mad

[5 messages deleted]

Ada asked me again if she could come with us this weekend

Look you know I really like her too but her reactions are uh

Hard to predict and I'm wary

its been several years now

Sometimes I throw out a couple of sentences about anomalous things as some kind of test just to see how she reacts but I'm not convinced

Especially since she's with Theo now

all the more reason for her to not be a snitch


I don’t know

What if she punches me

shes not like that

You would say that

weve been friends for ages and ive seen her break things

but never hit people

She scares me

youre two heads taller than her



Happy anniversary

its not my bday

Anniversary of uh when we first started to date


Remember how you tried to hit on me


wtf you kept screenshots?? help i cant

Still not over it after three years I have to admit

yeah that was cringe wasnt it lol

Cringe is dead I pissed on its grave

Except for your flirting technique with Voulzy

Still cringe

wtf xD

Anyway I came back early

I made some chocolate cookies

why is everything always about food or magic whenever youre involved

Listen those are the only two emotional languages I've mastered over the years


[34 messages deleted]

Where are you?

ill be there soon the train was cancelled and I had to go to the pharmacy too

the guy changed my prescription im gonna take something lighter now

Oh that's cool


Can I ask you a tough question

yeah yeah of course

You never explained to me why you were hurting yourself in the first place

I mean ok you were in a bad place mentally but at what point does that help instead of making things worse

You don't have to answer right now, we can talk about it at home if you like


im still here i was just thinking

its easier to talk about it through a screen actually i think

when i was hurting myself all the other stuff would fade away you know? my shitty family and my grades and being a fucking loser and all that stuff would fade into the background and i could focus on something else entirely

it gave me some kind of illusion of momentary invincibility

you see while you are doing it you know exactly why it hurts and you have full control over it

unlike all the other stuff you cant control in your life

youre the boss and nobody else is

its your body and you do whatever you want with it and nobody can do anything about it, in the moment thats your mindset and it seems like a good thing even if in reality it sucks

i see you writing i know youre gonna say its a very dangerous mindset

i know ok

i know

thats why im still seeing a shrink ok


sorry for what

I'm not sure

I don't know

I really don't know what to say, I'm sorry for asking the question in the first place

You know I suck at the 'comforting' stuff

i know

thats part of your charm lol

I'm glad you're over it though

partly thanks to you

ill be there in 10 minutes

how do you learn the trick that the guy who walks on the shelves did the other day

thats so cool

Uh I'm not sure, he's just a minor reality bender who sometimes hangs around

From what I understand he's just too lazy to use a ladder

ok but how can i learn how to do that

I think people are born like that? It’s not really my field of expertise

There are hyper invasive methods to acquire these abilities too but they really suck


You're disappointed


i want to say fuck gravity too lol

I'm not here Friday night, they're having a party and I have to manage the entrances, I’ll sleep there afterwards

would you lend me the handkerchief if you're not here I want to read a book about you know what

and could you make one for me

a handkerchief

I can't make you one I don't know the process

The handkerchief is not mine, I got it from a friend working for the S.H.


In a couple of years there's a chance I'll be able to start creating stable stuff but I don't have the confidence to try it right now, if I screw up I'll end up with only half of a boyfriend

not a problem

at least as long as you can keep the top half

Cyril no

Ok so I told K. about Théo and she wants him to go to a job interview for the store, you know the one

ohhh thats great

haha I just pictured her with her branches sticking out of her hair giving an interview

lol she won’t be the one doing the interview ok

I thought that knowing about the store would be a good first step to get Ada in the loop because I still feel guilty for not telling her anything

I mean, you get the idea

Anyway I left you a paper with some coordinates to give to him, you know the drill



a question ive been asking myself since the other day

your friend who gave you the handkerchief, will we see him one day?

he could teach me

I don't think we’ll ever see him I cut ties with him years ago


Not sure I can explain

what did he do


He was a really good friend

I just didn't deserve him, that’s all

i told you before but i have no fucking clue how you manage your relationships and it doesnt reassure me regarding ours

No you’re special ok

The archivist told me to tell you that you have one week left to turn in "resurgence of the art of transdimensional voyage in the 20th century" or else

He didn't say or else *what*, but yeah

Incidentally I saw your carp again and I think my carp could kick its ass

Not even saying that in a macho way or anything, just a thought that came to me


Oh and apparently it's official, we can put Ada in the loop

really? At last

i cant take the dumb shit i have to invent about what i do on my weekends with you anymore

especially since my sister blocked me cause i can't even use her as an excuse now


no its ok really

fuck them all

to hell with their bullshit

masters gave Cyril homophobia, Cyril is a free elf

Ada has a bad influence on you

i never read these books, thats the worst part

[11 messages deleted]

Next time we go you know where I'll show you a cool spot

I can't say everything in texts and you know it but

There are monoliths like uhh like the guy you were talking about a few months ago, let’s say

I can't believe this is routine for you I'll never get used to it

my hype is real

almost crying rn

You think seeing stuff like that is routine for me

I'll never get used to it either or I would have stopped a long time ago

i dont have anything that crazy to share with you, thats the worst part

i feel useless

You have normal life to share with me and I'll never understand how it works

And I don’t know how to deal with it

That cog is missing in my brain lol I didn't get the manual

We complement each other well I would say


nothing i just dont know what to say

im happy

we received the tax notices


Or not


hey i thought about something while checking the notices, since its been four years already

i looked at how it works and it would be super simple to get a civil solidarity pact, actually

that would be better for the taxes, wouldn't it?

i dont know, we could even make a little event out of it

we dont even have to consider it as a romantic thing if you dont want to, it can be purely paperwork eh


i put a book that i have to return on your table


thank you for returning the book

do you want to make pancakes? i never learned how to make them but you could teach me

eh I found the file on my old mp3 player lol


you said we would go you know where to see a thing, do we have a date or not? it's been a while

youve barely been home lately and youre not answering my messages anymore

are you ok?

Astro? Please answer me

I think we need to take a break

what did i do

did i say something wrong


Astro please its been two days please answer

Astro i respect your choice to take a break but at least tell me what i said or did

at least tell me what i did wrong

how can i fix what i did if you dont explain it to me

listen i dont know what I said or did but im sorry

im sorry Astro

say something I beg you

i dont know what to do

its been a week now


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