SCP-024-FR
rating: +2+x

Item #: SCP-024-FR

Threat Level: Yellow

Object Class: Safe

Special Containment Procedures: Object is to be kept under a sealed glass dome at all times, within a 2x2x2.5 meters room fitted with a depressurisable airlock. Should the glass dome be damaged, a D-Class personnel equipped with a hazmat suit is to enter the room to assess the damage, in order to have the glass dome replaced as soon as possible. Light repairs such as sealing off cracks or putting mastic are not to be considered as sufficient, and may only be carried out at the behest of Level 2 personnel for a limited amount of time.

The exact vector by which SCP-024-FR affects human beings is still unknown, any affected personnel is to be immediately restrained with a straitjacket and placed in a standard hospital bed, under permanent medical surveillance. Their jaw is to be kept shut by force.

As of Incident 024-FR-21, personnel are not permitted to stay within the containment chamber longer than twenty (20) minutes, regardless of the protections they are wearing.

Description: SCP-024-FR appears to be a normal Parisian ham sandwich, presenting a very large size, with an estimated diameter of 35cm and a length of 20cm. Observing the object has no effect, as long as it is kept under its sealed glass dome. Therefore, it is supposed that the effect is due to a smell or a non-transmissible pathogen infecting the subject, hereafter designated SCP-024-FR-1.

The process described in Experience Log 024-1 is triggered at the first exposure to the object. Subject will feel the urgent need of swallowing SCP-024-FR all at once, regardless of the physical damage linked to this impossible action. One side of the sandwich is covered with a standard paper towel, which does not present the name of a any restaurant or brand. Instead, an inscription reads "Go ahead, U can Totali swalo Dat", and, lower, "Are We Tasty Yet?". Thus, the object is supposed to be linked to the pseudo-artistic Group of Interest Are We Cool Yet? , whereas it was found laying on a dustbin in a back alley of ██████, next to the corpse of a homeless person who seemed to have [DATA EXPUNGED] his own jaw.

As of 08/17/2012, it is forbidden to expose any human being to SCP-024-FR by the Ethics Committee's decision (Letter 024CE65, archived). That limits current knowledge on the effects of the object (attempts at exposing animals have been unsuccessful). This document is based on the circumstances of its recovery and on the experience log below.

Addendum 024-21: An incident involving Dr. Lears has led to reevaluation of the current containment of SCP-024-FR, new procedures are under review. For now, it is forbidden to expose more than necessary, and only as part of constructive experiments approved by at least one Level 2 personnel. The only available description of the incident comes from Dr. Lears' personal recorder. Transcript of the recording is attached to this document as Incident Log 024-LEARS-A8.

Experience Log 024-1, 08/14/2012: First and last exposure attempt of a D-Class (D-0568) to SCP-024-FR.

D-0568 is wearing no protection, and is equipped with an earpiece to receive instructions from researchers, who are monitoring the room through the security camera. However, the procedure consisted in sending the D-Class in the containment chamber without interfering in the exposure. T=0 was put when D-0568 began to show an interest in SCP-024-FR and is not to be considered as accurate without further testing.

T=-2min23: D-0568 enters the chamber, and goes in front of the glass dome under which SCP-024-FR is placed, waiting for instructions.
T=-1min57: D-0568 remove the glass dome and put it on the ground. D-0568 exhibits no particular behaviour and looks bored.
T=0min00: D-0568 shows a keen interest in the object. He bends down, as if he is studying its length.
T=2min06: D-0568 is now taking measures with his hands, visibly comparing its length, width and especially its diameter.
T=3min11: D-0568 seems to be losing himself in an intense reflection, comparing the object's measurement with his jaw. Dr. Baltin requests the immediate cessation of the experience. Denied.
T=3min24: D-0568 is holding the object and tries to insert it inside his mouth, unsuccessfully. The object's diameter is much too big for his jaw. Dr. Baltin is discharged for his inability to stay calm.
T=3min48: D-0568 shows signs of confusion. He tries to open his mouth wider, with the help of his hands, trying to match the object's measurements.
T=4min12: D-0568 grasp his lower jaw with one hand and his upper jaw with the other one, showing signs of intense effort. Dr. Laurent is discharged for his inability to stay calm.
T=5min06: D-0568 has managed to break his jaw. Subject seems to suffer at a normal level for a bone fracture with important lesions of facial tissues. SCP-024-FR seems not to anaesthetise the subject. Pain increases as he unsuccessfully tries to insert the object in the opening. Despite pain and blood loss, D-0568 appears to be determined. Dr. Harlow is discharged for his inability to cease asking for subject's termination.
T=5min46: Subject dies as a result of his injuries, after a full ablation of his lower jaw. It has to be noted that the object presents no damage after D-0568's attempt to consume it.

Excerpt from Incident Log 024-LEARS-A8, 01/02/2013

"[…] However, it appears that the object was designed in an aesthetic way, attesting to the implication of "Are We Cool Yet?" as much as its abilities, even though the object has no memetic effect like those morons are used to. I asked Agent Dears, she's a specialist. According to her, it matches their mode of action, a sort of criticism of overconsumption. But she doesn't know more than us about how it works. I'll check skips linked to this Group of Interest after the break. Maybe we'll understand why those fools tortured themselves for this sandwich. That's incredibly sick. What was wrong with them… plus, frankly, it's like… the size of my wrist ? Nearly ? Ha, a bit more. Anyway, with such a length… Even if it's not that big, i don't know what they thought… Plus we just need to… This side looks thinner… Just need to… Open… A little wider… Open… A little… Bit… […]"

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