SCP-186-DE during its apprehension.
Item #: SCP-186-DE
Object Class: Keter
Special Containment Procedures: SCP-186-DE is to be housed in a standard cell for humanoid anomalies and provided with three meals per day. His cell is to be equipped with increased security measures against outside intrusion, and opportunities for entertainment are to be provided, which, however, must first be reviewed and approved by the head of the containment team. SCP-186-DE may make requests in this regard, but these don't need to be granted.
Letters manifested by SCP-186-DE's anomalous properties are to be scanned and checked for key terms after SCP-186-DE has read them. They ae to be archived in the event that they contain important information. Otherwise, they may be disposed of with the regular paper trash. SCP-186-DE is not to be stopped from reading these letters.
On the night of 24. December to the 25. December each year, SCP-186-DE's position is to be tracked with an implanted tracking device at all times. Should a Holy Night Event occur, MTF DE17-𝔚 "The Grinches" shall be dispatched to re-contain SCP-186-DE. MTF DE17-𝔚 is not a permanently standing MTF and is to be disbanded after the December 25th of each year and reformed in early December of the next year. It should be noted that re-containment can only be enacted after the end of the Holy Night Event.
If re-containment fails, units shall be dispatched from Foundation facilities which are next to SCP-186-DE's position to reestablish containment. All witnesses are to be amnesticized, objects supplied by SCP-186-DE to be confiscated, and phenomena created by it shall are to be covered up with appropriate cover stories if necessary. There is usually no need to influence media, as they are dismissed as hoaxes by the general public, except in cases of bodily harm or worse. In that case, the reports must be censored and deleted.
Despite its anomalous nature, it should be noted that SCP-186-DE can be harmed by ordinary means, except when a Holy Night Event is in progress.
Description: SCP-186-DE is an entity with the appearance of an elderly man wearing a classic Christmas costume, including a rod. Attempts to remove this costume, whether by Foundation personnel or SCP-186-DE himself, have so far failed, although demonstrably nothing about SCP-186-DE's clothing is attached to him to such a degree that removal would be impossible. SCP-186-DE is 193 cm tall and weighs about 105 kg. It is proficient in all languages spoken in the world today and can also swear in 32 more.
SCP-186-DE exhibits several anomalous characteristics in addition to its inability to remove its clothing. For one, the Hume concentration of its endogenous reality is 0.8 Hume, although it should be noted that this condition does not have the expected effects on the entity. Furthermore, it regenerates injuries instantaneously once it is no longer directly observed. SCP-186-DE also has correct information on seemingly every person in the world at all times. How it obtains this information without interacting with said people is as yet unknown. Otherwise, however, SCP-186-DE possesses the same characteristics one would expect from a human of its stature and apparent age.
Every year from late November to December 24th, letters begin to manifest in SCP-186-DE's environment. Based on experiments with paper with special watermarks, it can be assumed that each of these letters is a copy of a real existing letter in this world. In order to be teleported as a copy to SCP-186-DE, a letter must have the following characteristics according to the results of several tests:
- The letter must be addressed to "Santa Claus," to "the North Pole," or to an address or addressee which intend Santa Claus as the recipient.
- The letter must include a list of requests and/or items that Santa is to fulfill and/or deliver.
- The letter must leave the possession of the author.
SCP-186-DE will then speed up time manifold in its immediate vicinity and for everything it touches and retrieve a yellowed scroll and a fountain pen from its coat and read the letters. It is believed that the mantle has space-distorting properties, as the scroll, fountain pen, and even other objects cannot be located when SCP-186-DE puts them in. High-speed camera footage shows that the scroll has the names of real people written on it along with their address and, if two people cannot be uniquely identified in this way because they have the same name and live in the same place, other identifying characteristics, sorted alphabetical by surname.
SCP-186-DE may be prevented from reading a letter, however, within a few minutes another copy will manifest near SCP-186-DE. This process continues, should this copy also be removed.
SCP-186-DE will pick out the sender on the list after reading a letter and cross out his name. In rare cases, however, it will place a check mark next to the name instead. The criteria for a check-off could not be fully understood so far, but as a general rule it was noted that SCP-186-DE will cross out the names of all those letter senders who have performed actions in the past year that are considered morally reprehensible by the majority of people in its immediate vicinity. Tests using [REDACTED] suggest that SCP-186-DE's knowledge of such actions is not derived from telepathy or similar phenomena, but appears to be based solely on the entity's memories.
SCP-186-DE receives approximately 200 million letters per season, which makes monitoring all of SCP-186-DE's edits only possible with computer technology. It could be observed that SCP-186-DE triggers a Holy Night Event on the night from the 24. December to the 25. December when it has checked off one or more names on its list. During such an event SCP-186-DE will gain the ability to ignore matter and resistance to its person and will try to get out into the open. If he succeeds, SCP-186-DE-1 will materialize in front of him.
SCP-186-DE-1 is a sledge of red color pulled by nine beings resembling reindeers (Rangifer tarandus). These beings are harnessed in rows of two, except for the foremost one, which stands centrally. Unlike its conspecifics, it has a bright red nose. SCP-186-DE is also loaded with a large, tied-up sack (hereafter referred to as SCP-186-DE-2) that appears to be fully packed. SCP-186-DE will then climb on top of SCP-186-DE-1 and goad its draft animals. The vehicle will then start moving , disregarding any terrain in the process, and, after a few meters, lift off the ground together with its team, contrary to its original purpose. In the air, SCP-186-DE can reach speeds of up to Mach 24, according to tracking data. It is not yet known how SCP-186-DE or the towing animals survive these speeds unharmed.
Like this, SCP-186-DE seeks out those people it has checked off its list and fulfills the wishes they have expressed in their letter. This process has been directly observed by the Foundation only twice so far, but there are numerous video recordings and testimonies of uninvolved persons from which data can be collected. According to this, SCP-186-DE lands with SCP-186-DE-1 on the roof or equivalent of the recipient's residence and then enters his house or apartment through the chimney. The dimensions of the chimney do not seem to matter here, it has even been observed successfully squeezing itself into chimney openings 5 cm in diameter, its body apparently deforming to suit the purpose. If it is not possible to enter the apartment in this way, SCP-186-DE will instead use a window or the entrance, whichever is easier to reach.
Once SCP-186-DE reaches its target's apartment, it will pull the desired objects from SCP-186-DE-2 and place it under an erected Christmas tree or in a hung Christmas sock or, if the recipient is in the room and awake, hands it over to him directly. If none of these is available, it apparently leaves the items next to the recipient's sleeping place. Any witnesses to its intrusion will be aware of its presence and may comment negatively on it, but for reasons not yet fully understood, will do nothing to counteract its intrusion. If phenomena have been desired, SCP-186-DE will pull glittering dust from SCP-186-DE-2 and throw it into the room that meets its conditions for depositing objects. The desired phenomenon will then manifest unless a time for its manifestation has been set. In this case, it will occur only at the desired time.
After finishing its delivery, SCP-186-DE will move to the next receiver or, if there is none left, will land on the ground. SCP-186-DE-1 and -2 will then disappear completely and SCP-186-DE will lose its anomalous properties gained through the event. The Holy Night Event is thus completed and SCP-186-DE is stranded at its present location.
SCP-186-DE has a generally rather negative and narcissistic attitude and is easily irritated. It seems to hold a grudge against its existence and in particular Holy Night Events, recognizable by the fact that it begins to curse loudly at their onset, which it seems to continue during its flight. Even when spoken to, it sometimes reacts in a very choleric manner. SCP-186-DE also seems to have an extreme dislike for children and shows pronounced misanthropy during deliveries. It insults people in the vicinity, makes derogatory remarks about festive decorations that may be in the room, and appears to actively attempt to carry out requests made to it in such a way as to cause maximum material, physical, and/or psychological harm to as many people as possible.
The Foundation has repeatedly attempted to exploit SCP-186-DE's apparent omniscience with respect to all persons in the world, but has so far failed due to a lack of cooperation on the part of SCP-186-DE, which has always demanded its releases or other absurd demands in return, such as the offering of multiple human sacrifices, the building of a temple, the destruction of the Coca-Cola corporation, or a complete worldwide ban on the manufacture of chocolate Santa Clauses. Torture was considered to force cooperation, but was rejected by the Ethics Committee. However, its knowledge of all Foundation employees makes it an extreme security risk, which, along with its inability to be contained during Holy Night Events, led to its Keter classification.
Addendum 186-DE-1:
Expressed wish: "I wish my teddy bear could talk."
Objekt/Phänomen: SCP-186-DE sought out the wisher's teddy bear and blew glittering dust at it. This gave the object vocal cords made of animal proteins, lungs and lips, as well as a mouth and tongue.
Folgen: The object was confiscated but has never made a sound so far. The organic components have shown no signs of decay so far.
Notes: SCP-186-DE seems to have taken the wish extremely literally. Research has shown that the object could speak if it had an appropriate brain to do so.
Expressed wish: "I wish to go to Disneyland."
Object/Phenomon: SCP-186-DE sought out the wisher and blew glittering dust into his face. He immediately set off on a direct path to Disneyland Paris, apparently without the subject willingly moving his body. No outside effects, with the exception of physical barriers such as walls or fences, could stop or divert the subject from its course, even though it remained completely vulnerable to them. Even an attempt to drive the victim to Disneyland Paris was fruitless, as the subject's ground contact could not be broken. It continued on its way even after breaking its shoes from constant wear and tear and sustaining massive abrasions on its feet, and after drowning while crossing a river. The anomaly disappeared only when the subject reached the entrance gate of Disneyland Paris.
Consequences: Foundation agents attempted to keep the subject alive, but were unable to locate a respirator quickly enough, as it was assumed that the subject would seek out the next bridge. All witnesses were amnesiticized and different cover stories were spread for the phenomenon depending on its place of occurrence.
Expressed wish: "I wish I would get healthy again."
Object/Phenomon: SCP-186-DE sought out the wisher and blew glittering dust into his face. All malignant lymphomas of the subject were removed. However, new ones formed within the next few hours. The subject became very depressed until he forgot the incident with the help of amnesitics.
Consequences: Medical personnel, along with the subject and witnesses present, were amnesticized and medical records were altered accordingly.
Notes: SCP-186-DE seems to have aimed for a temporary recovery only.
Expressed wish: " I wish Peanut would live again."
Object/Phenomon: Unknown, "Peanut" was reanimated and infected with SCP-008.
Consequences: Before the Foundation was alerted by emergency calls, "Peanut" managed to infect 31 people. All those infected were captured and incinerated. The incident was explained as a mob of users of a new designer drug.
Expressed wish: "I wish all girls I know would like me."
Object/Phenomon: SCP-186-DE sought out the wisher and blew glittering dust in his face. The subject subsequently possessed an anomalous effect that affected all the women he was acquainted with. Affected persons showed affection towards the wisher, which quickly increased to obsession, until the affected persons became emotionally dependent on the wisher.
Consequences: A total of 23 people were affected by the effect. The Foundation was able to reverse the effect by taking the wisher into custody and administering targeted amnestics that made him forget all his acquaintances.
Notes: SCP-186-DE seems to have a very broad understanding of "linking".
Expressed wish: "Mom and Dad should stop fighting all the time!"
Object/Phenomon: SCP-186-DE killed the wisher's parents by shoving enough candy canes down their throats to suffocate them.
Consequences: The police were alerted, but the case was then taken over by the Foundation and covered up. Class A amnestics were administered to the witnesses.
Notes: The wish seems to be fulfilled, technically, since the two dead people can no longer argue with each other.
Addendum 186-DE-2:
Foreword: This was the first interview conducted with SCP-186-DE after its first recapture. Data on its modus operandi and anomalous effects were already available.
<Begin Log>
Dr. Oswald: SCP-186-DE, after the events of the last few days, how do you feel?
SCP-186-DE: Crappy, that's how I feel.
Dr. Oswald: Do you feel any remorse for what you have done?
SCP-186-DE: No, I feel like shit because this crap happened again. Stupid model kids…
Dr. Oswald: And given the incident-
SCP-186-DE: Now, listen to this, will you? That snotty-nosed brat wished to get back at his father. So why not an AK47 for this purpose?
Dr. Oswald: You are omniscient when it comes to persons, you must have known that the boy had psychological problems because he had been locked up all this time.
SCP-186-DE: So what? Not my problem. Good kids get what they want. Deal with it.
Dr. Oswald: Your gifts are rarely what the children want. Think of that incident with the girl who wished her mother was with her.
SCP-186-DE: What can I do about the fact that her mother had been lying at the bottom of Lake Constance for three years? These brats only want something from me and never do anything for me. If you don't formulate exactly, you're out of luck.
Dr. Oswald: Whatever you say. I know this question has already been asked, but how do you know what you know? About people, I mean.
SCP-186-DE: Dude, I'm Santa fucking Claus. I'm expected to know that.
Dr. Oswald Expected? What does that mean exactly?
SCP-186-DE: Ooh… Alright, listen up, this is going to be a longer story. Christmas didn't always exist, I hope you know that.
Dr. Oswald: Quite, it was invented by the Christians, if I'm not mistaken.
SCP-186-DE: No, they just made it marketable. Precursors of Christmas were celebrated thousands of years before. Or, executed, I should say.
Dr. Oswald: What are you getting at ?
SCP-186-DE: Quite simply, once upon a time, yes? Once upon a time, I was the personification of winter made flesh. Not just some piddly wannabe winter like what you mostly imagine here nowadays. No, a real winter, with blizzards and long frosts and months without sunshine. Hoho. People did right to fear me and bribed me with sacrifices. Man, those were the days.
Dr. Oswald: What kind of sacrifices?
SCP-186-DE: Animal sacrifices and human sacrifices, you goofball, where do you think the bean king thing came from? Was a form of drawing lots, whoever got the bean got sacked. At least you guys were tactful enough to put it on another holiday. Unlike the British with their Christmas Pudding…
Dr. Oswald: And what did you do for these human sacrifices?
SCP-186-DE: Didn't let the winter get that hard. Most of the time. Sometimes I let myself go, just because I could. Buried whole villages under ice. Hoho, that was awesome back then.
Dr. Oswald: And that stopped because?
SCP-186-DE: Southerners. Never showed myself to people, I couldn't because I didn't have a sufficiently coherent form. Each tribe believed in something else that represented winter. In any case, the southerners from the places where my influence was not so great persuaded my followers that I was not so powerful and that it was not necessary to offer me sacrifices. Assholes.
Dr. Oswald: Wait, you say you are formed by faith.
SCP-186-DE: Yeah, of course, I was a god, man. A real badass one. Well, anyway, the southerners traded with the more northern people and brought their crappy ideas with them. As a result, over time, my actions were attributed to other gods. Persephone, for example. Comes from Greece.
Dr. Oswald: Hm.
SCP-186-DE: That made me much less powerful. But hey, I was just the personification of winter, now in the service of more powerful gods. No, it really went downhill with this Nicholas of Myra, he came with this gift nonsense and instead of creating a new character this belief got me… From then on I got a new image. I used to give presents to people on the sixth, until my date was changed to the 24th, because people were fed up with the veneration of saints. Well, then I became more and more what I am now, mainly because of the stupid Americans.
Dr. Oswald: Didn't your current design come about because of Coca-Cola?
SCP-186-DE: Yes, and watch what you say…
Dr. Oswald: All right, so much for that. But then why do you do what you do?
SCP-186-DE: Because I have to. It has nothing to do with voluntariness. People think that I give presents to good children and that's why I do it.
Dr. Oswald: And why aren't you at the North Pole then? Many believe you live at the North Pole.
SCP-186-DE: Because not everybody believes it. Some think I live in Lapland or somewhere else. The picture is not coherent enough. Just like many children don't believe that Knecht Ruprecht or Krampus come to visit them. Or that I'll give them coal if they're not good. The idiots didn't think of that. By the way, I was stranded in the Russian tundra for two years, imagine that. Just because of this stupid compulsion.
Dr. Oswald: So it was the belief in Santa Claus that gave you your current form.
SCP-186-DE: You guessed it.
Dr. Oswald: That's very enlightening, really, but allow me one last question. Why did you tell this so readily?
SCP-186-DE: Because I want the truth to come out. The truth that no one but you seems to have cared about so far.
<End Log>
Closing Statement: SCP-186-DE continues to behave in a very rude and uncooperative manner towards Foundation personnel. Since this interview, consistently lower average winter temperatures have been recorded at his respective containment site than elsewhere in the immediate area.
Addendum 186-DE-3:
Foreword: The following is an amateur recording of a Christmas party, which SCP-186-DE abruptly joined to deliver to five-year-old Jochen Scholz.
<Begin Log>
The Scholz family is sitting at the table and is engaged in conversation. In the background SCP-186-DE can be seen squeezing out of the chamber kiln located in the room and then pulling out SCP-186-DE-2.
SCP-186-DE: Woah, you need to clean up in there.
Werner Scholz (The father of the family): W-Who are you? And how did you get in here?
SCP-186-DE approaches the table, everyone present expresses concern, but no one stands up.
SCP-186-DE: Well, what do you think, fart knot?
Werner Scholz: Hey, leave immediately-
SCP-186-DE: Shut up, or I'll tell Wibke what you do every Tuesday when she's not in the house. Dude, what kind of ugly Christmas tree is that? You probably stole the tinsel from the neighbors, huh?
Werner Scholz: What!
SCP-186-DE: And then all the presents. You should rename the festival to Comercemas. Never mind. Jochen Scholz, you made a wish, and since you've been good all year, now you'll get something from Santa Claus.
Jochen Scholz: Really?
Werner Scholz: Jochen, stay away from him!
SCP-186-DE: Shut up, you moron! Here you go.
SCP-186-DE reaches into SCP-186-DE-2 and takes out a gift box measuring about 20 cm x 30 cm x 15 cm and puts it on the table. It is completely on fire, but this does not seem to harm the entity.
Jochen Scholz: What is that?
SCP-186-DE: What is that- You wished for a fire truck, didn't you?
Jochen Scholz: I wished for a fire truck like the ones for the fire fighters!
SCP-186-DE: Then wish properly next time, runt. I'm off now. Merry Christmas, you assholes.
SCP-186-DE gets back into the chamber stove and leaves the apartment. Afterwards, relative panic breaks out while those present try to extinguish the fire, which gradually spreads all over the table.
<End Log>
Closing Statement: After SCP-186-DE's visit, a fire broke out in the apartment, killing three people. This was caused by the "fire truck," which had proven impossible to extinguish by any means even after it was seized by the Foundation.
