Apart from his in-depth knowledge of the life of Caesar and the Roman world of the end of the Republic, SCP-482-FR exhibited an astonishing knowledge of the modern academic world, as well as fluency in English, French and Italian. It is assumed that all this information was taught to him or at least provided by the terrorist organization SAPHIR, which he seems to serve through what he calls the Education Campaign in Superstition, Augurs and their Risks .
SCP-482-FR manifests itself randomly through cinematographic works, and more particularly in horror, horror and fantasy genre films. All these works have in common the highlighting of signs announcing to the protagonists the imminence of a threat and generally ignored – a classic scriptwriting device used to establish a dramatic irony. The threat in question will be systematically defused by the interference of SCP-482-FR within the plot, always according to the same pattern:
These monologues constantly vary according to the film and the context in which it is stated. Nevertheless, despite some variations, they all begin with the same introduction, transcribed below:
Following the intervention of SCP-482-FR, the film will follow during the remaining duration of the recording the protagonists going about their usual occupations, without specific plot or script interest. After that, restarting the film will show the normal sequence of shots from the original work, but without any characters or threats. The film will therefore be limited to a series of empty environments, with no possible reversal. It should be noted that SCP-482-FR does not alter films in their entirety as works, but only by isolated medium (VHS, DVD, Netflix account…). Thus, the other copies of the film will not be affected by his intervention.
| Film altered |
Type of intervention |
| Shining (1980) |
Jack Torrance (Jack Nicholson) sits at the Overlook Hotel bar and orders a drink from the ghostly apparition of Lloyd, the bartender. SCP-482-FR comes to sit by his side, then undertakes to confiscate his drink and expose the deleterious effects of alcoholism on his mental health, and of his attitude on the mental health of his family. His speech to the viewer is about the dangers of alcoholism and narcotics. |
[BEGIN TRANSCRIPT: 01:04:45]
Lloyd: What will it be?
Jack: Well I'm so glad you asked me, Lloyd. Because I have two twenty and two ten dollar bills right here in my wallet. I was very afraid to see them staying there until April. Here's what I want: you give me a bottle of bourbon, a shot glass and some ice… You can do it, Lloyd, can't you? You are not overwhelmed! (laugh)
Lloyd: No, sir, I'm not at all.
The bartender begins to prepare a drink.
Jack: Well done! You fill in and I smack them, Lloyd, one by one! That's the white man's sin, Lloyd, mate. This is the sin of white people!
Jack Torrance opens his wallet and notices the lack of liquidity.
Jack: Hey, Lloyd, I feel like I'm running out of steam for the moment… Could I get some credit at this bar?
Voice to his left: This is for me.
The camera widens the shot, revealing SCP-482-FR sitting at the counter to the left of Torrance.
SCP-482-FR: (sliding two denarii to the bartender) A glass of falerne for me, innkeeper. Unless you have one of those sweet Nile wines?
Lloyd: I'm afraid not, imperator. But I have a California red that might be to your liking.
SCP-482-FR: Then the die is cast.
Jack: So that's great. Who said all politicians were rotten, huh, Lloyd? That's very kind of you, Jules. Very kind of you! You have always been the best, friendliest of generals, from Corduba to Alexandria in Egypt. Alexandria of Arachosia, to be more exact!
As he is about to drink his bourbon, SCP-482-FR rests the palm of his hand on his glass.
SCP-482-FR: Jack, I think we should have a little chat.
Jack: It's about the kid, isn't it?
SCP-482-FR: It's about everything, I'm afraid. Everything is in everything. What do you think you're doing here, Jack?
Jack: What do I think I'm doing? Breaking my hips, gnawing at my bones holding this hotel up, writing this fucking book, putting up with this bitch sabotaging all my work, day after day, winter after winter… And you ask me what I do ?
SCP-482-FR confiscates the glass of bourbon from Torrance and slides it to its side.
SCP-482-FR: It's your first winter here, Jack.
Jack: My…? Of course not !
SCP-482-FR: Of course it is.
Jack (after a few seconds of thinking) : Yes, of course it is. My first winter. It's getting late, Jules. It's getting late, and he's getting sober. Do you know what I would need to get my mind back together?
SCP-482-FR: Yes, but I'm afraid you don't. We're not that different, Jack. Don't think I don't know your situation. Why didn't I spend the winter on the icy coasts of Bibracte, finishing writing De Bello Gallico covered in a heavy woolen coat after having brought the Gauls to their knees! And did I end up covering my shelves with "Labor tantum sine otio Julium fastidiosum puerum facit." ? I do not believe. You are guarding this hotel like a German outpost, and it is a great honor that requires rigor and strength of character.
Jack: Sorry, Jules. It is this hotel that…
SCP-482-FR: Lies! This hotel is nothing but a heap of stone and tiles that you have lined with superstitions and anxieties. Don't get caught up in it. You want to know what your real problem is, Jack?
He takes the glasses of wine and bourbon and spills the contents on the bar floor.
SCP-482-FR: Here is a libation that should ward off your demons. Sobriety is the hallmark of a great commander, Jack, a sign of discipline and mental order. You still have the end of winter to hold out here, and the only assault you have to hold out is on a blank slate. Do not be haunted by your family, they respect their patriarch, and you should pay them the honor from which paranoia of this gloomy palace and its creaking pipes took you away.
Jack: What a waste, god damn it, Jules, what a waste! A first choice bourbon! Lloyd! Quickly bring a mop before the liquid ruins this old wooden floor!
SCP-482-FR: Yes, Lloyd, do that.
Jack Torrance turns to the bar. No one is behind the counter.
Jack: What the…?
SCP-482-FR: There is no Lloyd, Jack. There never was. It's just you, the bottles, and the reflection in the mirror.
Jack: But… And those glasses?
SCP-482-FR: You served them, Jack. Yours as mine.
Jack: God…
SCP-482-FR (rising from his stool) : Do us all a favor, Mr. Torrance. Pull yourself together, make peace with yourself, and don't touch another glass. And, if I may say so, get a mop before the liquid ruins the floor. A little discipline, damn it!
[END OF TRANSCRIPT: 01:08:56]
Epilogue: Following this conversation, Jack Torrance joins his wife Wendy and his son Danny, where SCP-482-FR acts as mediator and psychologist. The three have a long conversation during which Jack apologizes for his recent attitude, and where Danny explains that the strangulation marks on his neck are not his father's, but a ghost — a close look at the part of SCP-482-FR reveals that it is in fact an allergic reaction to his shirt collar. At the end of the day, Jack resumes writing productively; he is clean-shaven and his hair is cut short, Roman style, a sign of his recovery.
|
| The Blair Witch Project (1999) |
Heather (Heather Donahue), Josh (Joshua Leonard) and Mike (Michael Williams) have been lost in Blair Forest for two days. As they discover dozens of wooden totems clinging to trees by Blair's witch, SCP-482-FR arrives and announces that the strange phenomena they have witnessed are the work of its legions setting up a camp not far from there. . |
Heather: What?
Mike (in the distance) : Lots of stuff over there!
Heather: What kind of stuff?
Mike (in the distance) : Like voodoo crap!
Heather: What?
Mike (in the distance) : Voodoo crap! There are some in every corner!
Heather: Oh, that's not true.
The following shots show dozens of totems suspended in the trees, made of branches assembled to form human silhouettes.
Mike: They're everywhere.
Heather: Oh, holy shit. (To Josh) Come on quick, I need camera 16!
Mike: That's bullshit stuff!
Heather: It's crazy what's in here…
Josh: Me, it scares me!
Mike: Yeah, me too!
Heather: Quick! I have to film everything…
Heather pauses as the sounds of trotting horses are heard. SCP-482-FR in general's uniform appears on horseback among the trees, accompanied by two other officers, supposedly Salviton and Curion.
SCP-482-FR (in the distance) : Hey, you there!
Heather: Oh shit, what else?
Mike: They're idiots! Roman counts! (laughs) I can't believe it! Hey ! We are here !
They wave their arms in the direction of the riders, who are approaching.
SCP-482-FR: What are you doing here, young wanderers? It's a military operation field here!
Josh: We got lost! We got lost!
Heather: We're not from Burkittsville, sir! We came here to shoot a documentary and we got lost in the forest! We're pretty happy to run into you, to be honest!
SCP-482-FR: A documentary? In the woods? With these devices, who says you don't rather spy on my troops for the Marilandii?
The two officers supervising SCP-482-FR draw their swords.
Heather: No, no, no, no! We assure you! We… We're here to investigate the legend of the Blair Witch! Look, look at these things hanging all around you!
SCP-482-FR: These things?
SCP-482-FR gazes at the branch totems, perplexed. He approaches one of them on horseback, draws his sword, and cuts the string. The totem falls by breaking on the ground.
SCP-482-FR: Probably the work of superstitious savages or jokers. I'm surprised at the Marilandii, who I thought were more civilized, and at you young people, who shouldn't be so impressed by a bit of wood and rope!
He eyes the students, visibly embarrassed.
Josh: Don't judge us like that, sir, we… we haven't slept in a while, we can't find our way around this forest and we're surrounded by noises during the night !
Heather: Yeah, well, if Mike hadn't screwed up the map…
Mike: Oh shut up!
SCP-482-FR: Noises? What noises?
Josh: Trees falling at night, footsteps, people running around the tent, that sort of thing.
SCP-482-FR: I see. My children, my men started setting up camp last night less than a mile from here. Many trees were cut down to build the palisades, these are certainly the sounds you heard. Not to mention the men looking for dead wood or berries. If any soldier serving the Senate and the Roman People has robbed or threatened you during this night, rest assured that justice will be served.
Josh: No, no… Look, we just want to get back to civilization, okay?
SCP-482-FR: Wise words. Follow me, we'll take you to camp and serve you a hot meal. Then we will advise you to go to Marilandii.
Heather: What about the witch?
SCP-482-FR: Nothing of the sort exists, or else, if the popular rumor is true, it is about a poor hermit harassing the lost during the night. Have you met any wanderer who actually believes this story? I suspected it. I will send men to burn all these barbaric symbols in the evening, that common sense reclaims the place. In the meantime, follow me. We are going to the camp which caused you so much fear.
[END OF TRANSCRIPT: 00:45:12]
Epilogue: Despite the protagonists' departure for the Roman camp, taking their cameras with them, the film breaks the codes of found footage and continues on a fixed shot of 6 hours and 32 minutes in the forest. From 3 hours 45 minutes, about thirty Roman soldiers arrive and undertake to cut down all the trees present in the field, then gather all the totems in a pile which they burn. The film ends with four legionnaires erecting a tropaeum, a trophy made from a tree trunk carved in the middle of the pile of ashes. The initials S.P.Q.R. and S.A.P.H.I.R. were engraved on the trunk.
|
| Nosferatu the Vampire (1922) |
Thomas Hutter (Gustav von Wangenheim) is welcomed into the castle of Count Orlok (Max Schreck) to sell him a property. After he tries to suck the blood from one of his wounds, then wakes up with two bite marks on his neck, he goes down to the crypt to check if his host is a vampire. He is then arrested by SCP-482-FR who reproaches him for his lack of trust and respect towards the dead. |
[BEGIN TRANSCRIPT: 00:25:30]
Awakening from his second night at the castle, Hutter suspects that Count Orlak is none other than Nosferatu, the vampire described by a local book discovered at the inn. He decides to go down to the crypt of the castle, in order to have the net heart, but, while he is about to open the coffin of Nosferatu, he is interrupted.
Cardboard: {One moment!}
Hutter turns around, terrified. A silhouette stands out in the shadow of the crypt and advances in its direction: it is SCP-482-FR. Hutter breathes a sigh of relief.
Cardboard: {Phew! It's just you!}
SCP-482-FR approaches the coffin and leans his hand on the lid. He shakes his finger, looking reproachful.
Carton: {Do you have no respect for the dead, for preparing to open their tombs like this!}
Hutter, looking scared, collapses on the steps of the stairs, his head in his hands.
Cardboard: {I have to get to the bottom of it! His taste for blood, his diurnal disappearances, those strange stings in my neck — Could Orlok be the Nosferatu ghost?}
He takes the book out of his jacket and waves it under the nose of SCP-482-FR, who snatches it from his hand and throws it violently through the crypt.
Cardboard: {Folklore! The change of scenery does not suit you! The count has gone to town to settle some business. Don't let the Dacian peasants contaminate you with their ignorant beliefs!}
Hutter and SCP-482-FR go back to the dining room of the castle, where the table has been set and a meal served. They sit down and start talking. SCP-482-FR waves its hands in the air, bothered by insects.
Cardboard: {Mosquitoes! This is the proven cause of your bites — and, I'm sure, of the Earl's move! This damp old building is conducive to bad dreams!}
The two characters clink glasses, laughing when the dining room door opens on Count Orlok. SCP-482-FR stands up to join him and gives him a hug.
Cardboard: {Orolocus, brave companion! You went out to terrorize your customers?}
Cardboard: {Alas! It is necessary ! I can't play mystery forever!}
Hutter gets up and joins them, looking incomprehensible. SCP-482-FR pats him on the back while laughing.
Cardboard: {Sometimes you have to be tricky to keep the plebs in line! You saw their looks of dread at the tavern — Orolocus likes to play his image to impress them.}
Cardboard: {Not seeing me all day makes their imagination work! It's hard to say 'No' when an undead asks you for tax!}
Hutter fusses around Count Orlok, looking annoyed.
Cardboard: {So this is all just staged?}
SCP-482-FR bursts out laughing, speaks while looking at the camera, then gives it an exaggerated wink.
Cardboard: {As sure as I come from Venus!}
[END OF TRANSCRIPT: 00:29:11]
Epilogue: As Hutter and Orlok return to the dining table together, SCP-482-FR begins to warn the viewer against realpolitik and the manipulation of the masses through superstition. After that, Orlok moves as planned to Germany, opposite Hutter, with whom he has made new friends. Both decide to get into municipal politics.
|
| Ring (1998) |
Journalist Reiko Asakawa (Nanako Matsushima), investigating a series of mysterious deaths, discovers a cryptic videotape in a hotel that is said to cause the death seven days later of all who watch it. After watching it, she is startled when she sees the reflection of Sadako, the ghost of the video, on the television screen.eo. It is actually SCP-482-FR sitting in a toga behind her. He convinces Reiko that the cursed video is an urban legend and that the recent deaths, although tragic, are from natural causes. |
[BEGIN TRANSCRIPT: 00:25:50]
Reiko plays the tape on the TV in the hotel room. The end of the video gives way to white noise on the screen. Reiko turns off the television, but jumps when she sees the reflection of a white figure standing behind her on the screen. She turns around: it was actually the gown of SCP-482-FR, sitting on the sofa just behind her.
SCP-482-FR: Good evening, Reiko. Funny video, isn't it?
Reiko jumps again when the bedroom phone starts ringing. Legend has it that the ghost calls its victim right after watching the video.
SCP-482-FR: Don't panic, miss. Why don't you come and sit with me instead, let's have a little chat?
Reiko doesn't take her eyes off the phone, which continues to ring.
Reiko: No one knows I'm here.
SCP-482-FR: Well then, pick up. Or would you prefer that I do?
Reiko: You saw the video too!
SCP-482-FR: Yes, well? These are just moving pictures. Pick up, please. That ringing is putting us both on edge, I'm afraid.
Reiko gets up and picks up the phone. At the end of the line, the same grinding noise as in the video is heard. She hangs up abruptly.
SCP-482-FR: Unpleasant, isn't it?
Reiko: Did you hear it too? It's the noise, the same noise as in the video!
SCP-482-FR: It's a noise you heard while you were on the phone and while you were watching the video, nuance.
SCP-482-FR gets up and draws the window curtains. The window overlooks a ramshackle playground behind the hotel, where there is a steel chain swing. A few seconds later, a gust of wind slightly moves the swing: the same creaking noise is heard.
SCP-482-FR: You see? Elementary. The phone call was probably the wrong number at the wrong time. An importunate.
Reiko drops onto the sofa, still scared but relieved.
Reiko: It's beyond comprehension. Sorry, I don't know what's gotten into me. This report really pissed me off…
SCP-482-FR: We would be for less than that. That's a lot of particularly abject deaths for a civilian who isn't used to dealing with it. A woman, moreover.
Reiko rummages in her bag and pulls out the photographs of the victims who led her here. Their faces are strangely distorted in the photographs taken after watching the video, a sign of the curse. She silently entrusts them to SCP-482-FR, who flips through them while clicking her tongue.
SCP-482-FR: What is it?
Reiko: Four teenagers who died from the curse, including my niece, Tomoko. These two were found dead in a closed car from the inside, he had tried to hide in his closet. All of them had their faces contorted with terror. Their faces are also distorted in this photo, look.
SCP-482-FR: I see, I see. Reiko, did you take a camera with you? Could you take it out?
Reiko complies, while SCP-482-FR pulls out a bottle of water in which he dips the tip of his index finger. With a flick, he sends a few drops on the device.
SCP-482-FR: Now look through the lens.
Reiko (looking at SCP-482-FR through the camera) : Gosh…
SCP-482-FR: Water droplets on the lens, that's all. It's a funny coincidence that they fell just at the level of the faces but, in the end, is it really so surprising? These photos are portraits, their faces take up a lot of space. As for their unfortunate deaths… I would not like to express myself too firmly on your niece where the young man in the closet without further information, but the couple in the car strongly resembles a tragic but unfortunately banal case of exhaust pipe poisoning. Stunned by the first fumes, the unfortunates had to try to get out of the car while forgetting that they had locked the doors, which will have pushed them to even more panic, and therefore more unconsciousness. Perhaps the other two learned of their death in advance, in some way, which would have sent them into a panic attack, or worse…Only a coroner can tell, but certainly not some silly high school rumor.
Reiko: You're probably right…
SCP-482-FR: Probably, yes. It will be up to you to check, when the police make their findings available to you. After all, you're a journalist, aren't you? Don't spread childish rumours. Who knows what role they can play on paranoia, irresponsible behavior, future accidents? What if the real curse surrounding this tape was not a ghost, but our naivety?
The two of them sit silently side by side, meditating on this last sentence.
SCP-482-FR: Is there room service here?
Reiko: I think you have to go ask at reception.
SCP-482-FR: Ah.
Ten seconds of silence.
Reiko: I'm going to get myself a soda.
SCP-482-FR: Bring me some table grapes, if they have any.
[END OF TRANSCRIPT: 00:28:09]
Epilogue: After this intervention, SCP-482-FR introduces the viewer to the principle of parsimony as well as the razors of Ockham, Hanlon and Hitchens. Reiko manages to reach the forensic pathologist of the criminal police, who confirms the trail of the poisoning by exhaust gases of the two teenagers. She therefore decided to devote her report to the risks of domestic poisoning in order to raise awareness of the dangers of everyday life.
|
| The Wicker Man (1973) |
Sergeant Neil Howie (Edward Woodward), sent to investigate under a false pretext on the island of Lord Summerisle (Christopher Lee), finds himself trapped by the inhabitants of the island who intend to sacrifice him to the pagan gods for a good harvest. As he is about to be immolated in a wicker mannequin, SCP-482-FR carries out a large-scale attack against the inhabitants, whose barbaric customs strongly resemble those he denounces in his // Commentaries on the Gallic Wars//. |
[BEGIN TRANSCRIPT: 01:15:36]
Sgt. Howie: No, wait! Please wait! Listen to me ! Whatever reasons you give yourself, you are going to commit murder! Don't you see? There is no sun god! There is no fertility goddess! Your crops are bad because your land is weak! The fruits are not made to grow on these islands, it is against nature! Can't you see that if you kill me, it won't bring back better crops? Summerisle, you know it won't change anything! Tell them! Tell them it won't get better!
Lord Summerisle: I know it will get better.
Sgt. Howie: But try to understand! If you have a bad harvest this year, then next year you will have to make another one of those damned sacrifices! And next year only the King of Summerisle, your lord, will be worthy of sacrifice! And since the harvest will be bad, next year your people will kill you on the first of May!
Lord Summerisle: Our land will be very fruitful! The sacrifice demanded by our gods will be accepted!
Sgt. Howie: And they'll get me! Police will come!
Lord Summerisle: There will be no trace left! Take him for the sacrifice!
The townspeople begin to grab Sergeant Howie, when a cloud of arrows swoops down at the edge of the crowd, lightly wounding a few islanders. The camera turns around, revealing SCP-482-FR on horseback down the moor, at the head of a marching centuria. The crowd disperses, panicked, and hides behind the surrounding granite blocks. Leaning against a block, Lord Summerisle pulls out a dagger and holds it under the sergeant's throat to hold him hostage. SCP-482-FR brandishes a wooden megaphone to address Summerisle.
Sgt. Howie: (laughs) They came! I told you ! I told you !
SCP-482-FR (in the distance) : Summerisle! I know where you are hiding! Come here let me kill you, degenerate Pictish!
Lord Summerisle: Shut up! Come back, pontifex!
SCP-482-FR (in the distance) : Barbarian! Don't think I'm unaware that you immolate free men! These primitive practices end today! See you all!
Lord Summerisle: You thought you were on Mona Island! But it's not Mona, tyrant! You are far, very far from Rome! Welcome to Summerisle! Nuada will consecrate your loss!
SCP-482-FR does not respond. After a silence of 40 seconds, an arrow vent to stick in the ground a meter from the hiding place of Summerisle. A wad of paper is planted on the arrow.
Lord Summerisle: And what is that supposed to mean? Is it your surrender, O divine Jules? (laugh)
SCP-482-FR (in the distance) : This is a comparative study of the fruit production of the island compared to that of the surrounding islands! I investigated too, Summerisle! The numbers are fake! Everything is there ! You do not produce more than the surrounding islands in the same climate! Your GDP sucks, you idiot! You make sacrifices on the pretext that the good harvests are dwindling, but they have always been like that! Submit, and you'll benefit from Roman agronomic genius instead of pissing in the fields!
Lord Summerisle: Lies! Get out, or I'll execute your Christian boyfriend!
SCP-482-FR (in the distance) : What?
Lord Summerisle: Christian!
A one-minute silence.
SCP-482-FR (in the distance) : What?
Lord Summerisle (poking his head out of his hiding place) : Christian!
SCP-482-FR (in the distance) : No, listen, you are holding a representative of federated Breton power and the authority of the law, kill this hostage and I will I will decimate for the example! Be very careful! We've had hands cut off for less than that!
Lord Summerisle: Or else what? Kill us, we will be reincarnated! Like the sun, we will always come back!
Another silence ensues, after which various arrows with copies of the report planted on them point towards the caches of the other inhabitants, who hesitantly retrieve them. After some time reading, murmurs begin to grow among the population.
SCP-482-FR (in the distance) : Choose well, you people! Those who want to live will live in the truth, those who choose lies will die under the civilizing sword of the imperium!
Extra: Has it been peer-reviewed? Was there a reading committee?
SCP-482-FR (in the distance) : Yes!
Lord Summerisle: What? Don't listen to him! Who tells you that he didn't embroider these pages from scratch?
Extra: Nothing more than you, honestly, sir. Sorry, huh.
Figurant 2: You have to compare the different points of view to be able to separate the true from the false!
Figurant 3: Our apologies, but it still looks very well sourced. Well, I don't know, eh, but all the same.
Lord Summerisle: Come on! He's not even from here!
A few islanders begin to come out of their shelters with their hands in the air to descend the moor towards the Roman army, followed by others. In the end, more than half of the inhabitants joined the Roman camp.
[END OF TRANSCRIPT: 01:24:57]
Epilogue: Faced with the last resistants, disarmed and outnumbered, SCP-482-FR does not launch the assault and is content with a general arrest. The warlord has all the adult men who have not surrendered hand cut off, for example, then has Lord Summerisle chained, announcing that he intends to parade him in his next triumph. As he drags Summerisle on foot behind his horse, he begins a monologue on the dangers of misinformation and the contributions of scientific advances to agricultural yields.
|
| Final Destination (2000) |
Installed in a plane leaving for Paris, Alex Browning (Devon Sawa) falls asleep and dreams of the minutes to come, which end with the explosion of the plane on takeoff and the death of all the passengers. Waking up in a panic, he pulls on the handle of the table of one of the plane's seats, which comes off like in his dream. SCP-482-FR, sitting on a nearby seat reading The Boy Who Cried Wolf, gets up and begins to calm him down, explaining to him that he is the victim of a phenomenon of already- seen quite common. |
[BEGIN TRANSCRIPT: 00:15:44]
Lisa: Alex? Alex?
Alex Browning wakes up from his premonitory dream, panicked.
Lisa: Would you mind swapping seats with Blake? We would like to be close. She asked Tod, but he said he was sick.
Blake: Be nice!
Alex jumps out of his seat and rushes to the seat he was in during his dream. He pulls on the handle of the tablet, which tears off, as in his dream.
Steward: Do you have a problem, sir?
Carter (from his seat) : Yeah, what's your problem?
Teacher: Alex, what is it?
Alex: The thing is, this fucking plane is going to explode!
SCP-482-FR, seated a few seats away, slams his book, a Greek edition of Aesop's Fables, and stands up.
Carter: Shut up Browning!
SCP-482-FR: Come on, come on, I'm asking you all to calm down!
Steward: But… Imperator! Shouldn't you be first class? It must be a mistake, I will immediately modify your post…
SCP-482-FR: I like to travel near the people, aviator, this will not be necessary. (turns to Alex) Young man, what is the reason for all the commotion among the ranks of your companions?
Alex: It's going to explode, that's what! We're all going to die if that plane takes off! I'm not kidding!
A panicked murmur rises among the passengers, but the tribune of the plebs stops the hubbub with a wave of his hand.
SCP-482-FR: Young man, slander is a serious crime, which is even aggravated when it is used to sow discord! Defend your allegation, or the punishment will be severe — you owe respect to your rhetorician and the journey he has prepared for you.
Unknown voice among passengers: Yeah, well said!
Alex: I saw it all, I… I had a vision right there. Lisa asks me to change places, so I find myself here, the bitoniau tears off… We take off, there's turbulence, then we say to ourselves that everything is fine… and then everything goes to hell!
Lisa: He was mostly sleeping, yeah! You had a nightmare, Alex, that's all!
SCP-482-FR: Come on, come on! I totally see what the problem is. Myself, last night, I dreamed that I was flying above the clouds, and… Well, that's a bad example. But my wife also does this kind of night terror, can you imagine! Just this morning, she announced that she had seen me crushed to death by the roof! (laughs) And yet, here I am! (addressing the passengers) Also, you people, don't treat your comrade harshly for an evil that affects even the noblest of patricians! (turns to Alex) But seriously… Alex, is that right? Do you know the scientific principle of déjà-vu?
SCP-482-FR turns to face the camera. It seems to address the viewer directly.
SCP-482-FR: The déjà-vu can be seen as a sort of cerebral short-circuit, caused by a communication error between the rhinal cortex and the hippocampus, two determining parts of our brain. It is the rhinal cortex which is responsible for bringing together the information captured by our senses, our feelings, our experience, and then sends these new elements to our hippocampus, the seat of memory, where they are archived as known elements. . However, it can happen that the rhinal cortex has very short breakdowns caused by a disorder in the electrical activity of the neurons, the short circuits of which I spoke. The information is duly recorded as memories by the hippocampus, but without having been identified as new elements beforehand… Hence the sensation of remembering things that are happening! This is a very common phenomenon among epileptics… Believe me, I know something about it!
Alex: But, I… I knew that Lisa was going to ask me to change places! That I was going to put myself towards Tod!
SCP-482-FR: You woke up when she asked you to, it's very different. Deja vu hit at that moment: you thought you remembered what she was asking when she was asking you.
Alex: No! And the handle, then! You all saw me rush to the seat, you know I had something in mind! How could I have known it would come off?
SCP-482-FR: Alex, you rushed at it when you were in the throes of panic. Without calling into question the solidity of this aircraft, this kind of plastic junk is not very solid, in addition to being continually mistreated by passengers.
SCP-482-FR turns to his seat and, forcing a little, tears off the handle of his tablet, which he brandishes in the air to show it to everyone.
SCP-482-FR: You see? My apologies to the crew on board, rest assured that I will reimburse the damage upon our arrival in Gaul. If, of course, our young friend Alex agrees to let us take off…?
Alex mumbles an apology and goes back to his seat.
SCP-482-FR: Well, congratulations to him. As for all of you, remember this: on average, there is one plane crash for every 1.2 million flights! You would have to spend more than 100,000 years in an airplane to hope to experience a crash, not to mention that in the event of an accident, 9 out of 10 victims survive! You are five times more lucky than Jupiter you strike with his lightning! So sit back, relax…and don't forget to enjoy the ride!
[END OF TRANSCRIPT: 00:20:10]
Epilogue: Once calm has been restored on board, the aircraft takes off without incident and no technical problems arise during the trip. After resuming its place, SCP-482-FR begins a monologue on the very low probabilities of plane crashes and their comparative statistical approach. After an ellipse, the plane normally lands at Roissy-Charles de Gaulle airport ten hours later, and the whole class comes down in good health.
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According to the first results of the tests conducted by Dr. Frog, exposure to SCP-482-FR results in a very clear drop in superstition and irrational fears in the viewer in 100% of cases, although he is for the moment impossible to determine if these decreases are natural or abnormal.
Exposed subjects find themselves up to 62% more capable of coping with stressful and destabilizing situations, in particular the absence of reference points or explanations for the phenomena surrounding them. This would make SCP-482-FR a very interesting asset for the training of the personnel of the SCP Foundation, in particular of the Mobile Intervention Forces. Furthermore, exposure to SCP-482-FR has been shown to have very satisfactory therapeutic properties on subjects suffering from paranoid and phobic disorders, which would also make it an asset for the Foundation's health services.
This use will depend on the success of Operation Zero Risk.
