rating: +8+x

What Is This????????

Good question, generic rhetorical sentence used on every single style page for some reason. This is the YOSSISTYLE, my own personal customized component/theme completely and utterly different from the other personal customized component/theme pages on this hellhole site!

The YOSSISTYLE is different though: instead of merely being some aesthetic changes designed to suit the whims of the author (like my contemporaries did), I instead designed this page to serve the masses, the people, the individual. Each person in of themselves. As Lenin once said, "You look for the person who will benefit, and, uh, uh…", and those words touched me. That is now my philosophy, and I'm proud to bring my glorious CSS revolution to the Wiki.

But Yossi, I pretend to hear you cry, surely this will make you many political enemies! How will you possibly win the upcoming SCP elections if you are providing free Sigma-9 edits to everyone? How will you afford to pay for the massive amounts of [[include]]s surely to follow the YOSSISTYLE's publishing? Are you going to address the upvote gap which separates the 1% from the rest of the Wiki? And to that I say shut up and don't worry about it I got it under control.

The YOSSISTYLE may or may not be compatible with Black HighLighter. I, personally, have no fucking clue as to whether or not the two work together. You're free to try, if you'd like, but just know that my fist is also compatible with your face and you probably don't want me to mix the two regardless.

How to Use??????

If I'm gonna be honest, I have no clue how to include this in a page. However, the god-emperor said she will not be inviting me to the secret shadow council meeting if I don't include instructions (hah, get it?), so I'll figure it out as I go.

Firstly, DO NOT do this:

@import url(;

This will summon SATAN HIMSELF to haunt your code and it will guarantee your article will receive downvotes. Our benevolent god-empress has enacted a ban that will allow him to delete pages which use the above code to prevent FUCKING SATAN from leaking into the Wiki and destroying you all. You fucking fools.

Instead, you can put the following code at the top of your page to ensure that all my amazing changes will be implemented without issue or delay:

[The Yossistyle has been declared a crime against humanity by the Tech Team and is no longer allowed to be used.]

Once you include the include in your article, include includes including prayers to our god-1 in order to satisfy them. Be sure to stand up from your computer or phone or whatever and turn in a circle three times before screaming "PRAISE BE THE DUCK! PRAISE BE THE STORM! PRAISE TO THE ANCIENT FALLEN ONES FOR THEIR SACRIFICES! ESSYPEE! ESSYPEE! ESSYPEE!" and performing a personalized musical number. This step is not strictly mandatory, but I'd suggest it if you ever plan on using themes again.

What Are Change??????

Well, change is the thing you lack in your pockets when you need it the most, but that's besides the point.

Below are a list of all the different modifications this theme makes to Sigma-9, in order to vastly improve it. Frankly, I'm of the opinion that these changes should be implemented site-wide, but CLEARLY SOME PEOPLE don't share my vision. Regardless, like my predecessors, I shall improve the Wiki not through some bogus policy or bureaucracy, but through the goodwill of my heart and also shitloads of cash.

Here is a comprehensive list:

  • The header was very displeasing to look at, and for good reason. Now, its issues have been addressed: the subtitle has been moved one pixel to the right.
  • I don't know how we went so long using #bb0011 of all colors for our links. This theme has changed it to be #bb0111, which has been proven to be scientifically easier to look at. You should always trust the science. Just look at it!
  • The sidebar now slowly scrolls down the page! Who doesn't love a scrolling sidebar? It moves if you look at it long enough.
  • The tag "theme" is now bolded, to emphasize that this page has a superiority complex. Amazing what the wonders of technology can do!
  • As it was a point of extreme controversy, I have added a period to the end of the licensing notice at the bottom of each page. Now you do not have to worry about avoiding the bottom of the page in fear of seeing a sentence without a period at the end. No need to thank me
  • Removed the "Watchers" button from the expanded menu. Do you even know what a watcher is?
  • The rating module is now capitalized. To emphasize it's the page's Rating™, not just its rating.

…And more!

Wonderful Reviews

Absolutely fantastic. A masterpiece of our times.

NagirosNagiros, 2021

[Sigh] …tech team approved, unfortunately. Please just get out of my house.

stormbreathstormbreath, 2021

🦆 🍞 ❤️ ✡️ 🙏

aismallardaismallard, 2021


AelannaAelanna, 2021

Too many !importants, downvoted.

CroquemboucheCroquembouche, 2021

[…]You know, this reminds me about that time I lead a revolution against the deep state in Illinois, back in the day. We ran a sting operation to throw the old governor out — nasty guy, by the way, absolutely atrocious — but it turns out he was actually the ringleader of the secret band of cocaine smugglers that in turn controlled the deep state that controlled him. Never could get that out of my head how backwards the logic wa— what? Oh, your theme looks nice. Anyways, the cocaine smugglers turned out to actually be clones of m[…]

djkaktusdjkaktus, 2021

I pissed myself.

WoedenazWoedenaz, 2021


rating: +8+x

All naturally occurring chaos occurs as a result of SCP-CN-2626.


Special Containment Procedures: Knowledge of the true nature of SCP-CN-2626 will have an irreversible effect on the human mind. As such, all information directly relating to SCP-CN-2626 is Level 6/CN-2626 Classified, and may only be recorded in Document CN-2626-P.

As the current state of "normalcy" is directly based upon SCP-CN-2626, SCP-CN-2626 and associated phenomena do not require specialized containment. If any evidence arises regarding the anomalous nature of the above, the public is to be misled to think otherwise.

Description: All randomly occurring events in this narrative level are due to SCP-CN-2626. Further information is unnecessary.

Addendum: Document CN-2626-P

Unless otherwise stated, the content of this page is licensed under Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike 3.0 License