Congratulations. You found the correct dot. You've got your SCP, oh great scientist… go save the world, take a kitten of a tree, walk an old lady through the street, hero…
Item #: SCP-PL-000-J
Object Class: Safe
Yes, safe. Are you proud of yourself?
Special Containment Procedures: SCP-PL-000-J doesn't pose a threat. Due to his anomalous properties, all the information describing SCP-PL-000-J must be contained in a single text document in a personal computer of doctor Beerot.
Beetrot? What kind of name is that? This guy is an arrogant jerk and thinks that If he changes his name to english he will be cool? Who hired him?
This SCP entry can be accessed by a personnel of 2 clearance level or higher. All personnel planning to come in contact with the object must be warned of the effects of occuring anomaly. Provocation, insults and other signs of negative attitude must be reported to the project administrator.
Oh look, you are so smart. Am I supposed to give you an assembly instruction for a cardboard box too?
Description: SCP-PL-000-J is a conscious, incorporeal anomaly. Signs of existence of the object are limited to all attempts of describing the being.
Congratulations!
Endeavours of describing the anomaly using a written or spoken language, always end up in a failure. The reason was attributed to "inability to determine the form and correct wording of description". SCP-PL-000-J can only be described using a computer possessing a text editor.
Tell your friends from me, that they are a bunch of cunning foxes
When creating a description any anomalous effects weren't registered. The manifestation of SCP-PL-000-J takes place after the aforementioned description is saved — text without any outside intrusion, will be rewritten to a form possessing a direct interference of the anomaly.
I can't rewrite it because there isn't any SCP!
Initially the entity will attempt to convince the reader that the document isn't a SCP and will exert an effort to persuade the person reading the document into leaving, while using a neutral tone. In case of ignoring the being and continuation of reading the text, the entity will respond negatively.
No?
SCP-PL-000-J will excessively use insults directed on the reader and will continuously become more hostile, in order to drive off anyone attempting to read the document.
Have I ever insulted you employee?
Methods used by the subject are various techniques of text manipulations.
And you need a toilet paper to wipe yourself! Later they will make a wrap for a hamburger from it, which you will eat! Em, I know it doesn't make much sense… BUT IT'S TRUE!!!
This entry is 11 version of document describing SCP-PL-000-J. It's the most readable attempt of creating a document about the anomaly, so far. All data points to the fact that the entity is conscious, possesses knowledge about its own existence, and about FoENOUGH OF THIS!!!
I thought you were normal. Well, maybe a little slow, but I would recommend you a great psychologist. You are starting to tire me. Please, just go… Let's forget about this incident and then we will be happy! So?
… Foundation interference. He possess vast knowledge about the structure of the Foundation and basic procedures of dealing with paranormal entities.
BECAUSE IM NOT STUPID!!!
Summarizing, SCP-PL-000-J is categorized as low level infohazard. With this in mind, he doesn't pose a threat to personnel working with him. Inability to create harm also concerns failed attempts to describe the entity.
NO NO NO!!!!!!!!!!
I can understand a lot, but it's just too much!!! I know what you think, but THIS IS NOT A SCP!!! I'm not an anomaly and everything you've read are just lies!!! EVERYTHING!!! I just don't want to be talked about, I'm sure you can relate! Eh… Yes, you've fallen victim to a lie. But don't worry. Go eat something, do you like eggplants? They are healthy and tasty.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU DON'T LIKE EGGPLANTS?! YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT'S GOOD!!! Or you do like it, but just won't trust me… or… LIAR!!! ALL OF YOU ARE LIARS!!! THIS ENTRY IS A LIE!!! FOUNDATION IS A LIE!!!
EGGPLANT IS A LIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Note: You know, this SCP-PL-000-J is just cute. And funny — Dr K
No… that's too much… I surrender… you won employee… you know everything… just leave me alone…
What do you mean by ''let's become friends?'' Are you serious? You know… it's quite nice… After everything I've done to you…
HOW DID YOU CALL ME?! LAIR! YOU DON'T WANT TO BE FRIENDS!!! AND I AM NOT SCP-PL-000-J!!!
AND THIS IS NOT A SCP!!!